Magnificent Bastard

Monday, March 18, 2024



western

Ask the MB: Clint Orms Belt Buckle

14K gold buckle w/ two 1/4 karat diamonds via Clint Orms, $11600.00
14K gold buckle w/ two 1/4 karat diamonds via Clint Orms. $11600.00.
Q: I recently picked up a silver Clint Orms "Trophy" buckle on vacation out west. In a room of Texan high-rollers you could call it understated, but I'm not sure how to pull it off in NYC without looking like a confused cowboy. Any suggestions?
--Charles


A: Charles, we applaud your decision to get a Clint Orms trophy buckle. For those unfamiliar with Orms, he's a Texas-based silversmith and engraver known for his meticulously crafted belt buckles that along with silver incorporate gold, rubies, diamonds, sapphires, and emeralds. A single buckle may be constructed from as many as 200 different pieces, take 200 hours to make, and cost upwards of $20,000.

Always remember, though, that while a belt buckle in it simplest form is functional, a belt buckle that costs more than $20 is essentially male jewelry, and male jewelry involving precious metals and stones is typically an express train to Toolbagville. So restraint is crucial. Orms clearly gets this -- even at their most ornate, his trophy buckles display a sense of lavish understatement (see example, pictured).

The key to wearing them in NYC is to keep that principle in mind. First, we'd recommend going with a matte black/brown leather belt rather than lizard, alligator, or anything else with a lot of shine or texture. Second, keep everything else simple too: Unadulterated denim, canvas sneakers or sandals, and a well-worn tee or polo can work with an Orms trophy buckle. Never wear it with a suit. Never wear it with a shirt that has pearl snap buttons or Western-style stitching. Never wear it with a cowboy hat, a lariat, or cowboy boots -- which should be pretty easy since you should never wear a cowboy hat, a lariat, or cowboy boots in NYC anyhow.

Ask the MB

Dan Post mignon boots in black via Dan Post Boot Shop, $159.95
Dan Post mignon boots in black via Dan Post Boot Shop. $159.95.
Q: Is it okay for an MB to wear cowboy boots even though one is not a cowboy? I'm not talking hitting the streets in full western get-up (big belt buckle, bigger hat, hoe-down shirt, etc.), just a simple pair of Dan Post black, elk hide shit kickers with brown suede tips. Today I've paired them up with a pair of Levi's Silver Tab boot cut jeans (boots inside the jeans, not out) and a snug black t-shirt from gap. I'm 35, trim and in good shape. Am I really just trying to live out some western-type fantasy, or can I consider myself an MB? By the way, great web site!
—Phil


A: Yeeeehawwwww! We reckon' you've arrived, compadre. Even if it is some sort of western-type fantasy (and that's OK) it sounds like you've successfully pulled this off, and we rate the degree of difficulty an 8.1 on the MB 10-point scale. Well done, you elk hide-wearin' Magnificent Bastard.

Every other potential shit-kickin' MB out there take note: This is risky business with potentially very low reward, and there ain't many Phils out there. One of our core shopping principles comes from GQ's creative director Jim Moore: "Never buy cowboy boots in Texas." The MB corollary to that rule is the removal of the "in Texas" part.

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  • 1 oz Berentzen Apfelkorn
  • 1/8 oz Laphroaig 10-year scotch
  • 2 dashes Angostura bitters

Combine all ingredients in a mixing glass filled with ice. Stir languidly for 28 seconds. Strain into ice-filled rocks glass.


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