Magnificent Bastard

Wednesday, May 8, 2024



Ask the MB

Ask the MB
Q: Dear MB: I have made the undies switch from cotton boxers to low cut boxer briefs (which i will refer to as "boy shorts"). I know the ladies and my balls love it but was this the right move?
—Graham

A: We can't vouch for your ladies, but are you sure your balls love 'em? Now it's like they're strapped into a seatbelt, and you're only driving on the conveyor belt in a carwash. Regardless, your question prompted us to do one of our favorite things: create a pseudo-scientific chart. We've concluded there is a direct correlation between underwear style value and testicle constriction:


underwear guide

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  • 2 oz Plymouth gin
  • 3/4 oz lemon juice
  • 1/2 oz Luxardo maraschino liqueur
  • 1/8 oz crème de violette

Lightly shake, strain into a chilled cocktail glass, garnish with lemon twist.

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