Ed. note: while we continue to work on the Spectacular Bitch's own site, she's answering an occassional question in this space.
Q: Dear SB: I have a pseudo-work event coming up and need your advice. The scoop:
1) 1000 guests — dozens of which will be co-workers (although it is not a work sponsored event, it's a birthday party for the owner of the firm)
2) Venue is a night club
3) All guests are required to wear black
4) I am in my mid-thirties and fairly fit
A: Dear Kelly,
Sounds like a fun party, although I must admit that I get more than a little peevish when I'm told what to wear. Who IS this monomaniacal birthday boy and more importantly, how do I get an invite?
Not knowing your body type makes it a bit tricky for me to find you the perfect dress, but that's okay, because I'm not going to recommend a dress for you. If you, like me, are feeling ornery about being told to wear black, I'll remind you that I didn't see anything on my invitation that said it had to be solid black, or even a dress for that matter. See how I did that, Kel? Resourceful! I'll pick you up at 7 and we'll stop for cocktails before we hit the fest.
Since everyone and their brother will be in a LBD that night, I say go with a tuxedo-type pant, a sexy top and a killer heel. Alice and Olivia make a very flattering pant — these girls know how to make a booty go pow. If your legs are covered, then go very uncovered up top — maybe a little something like this, or this or this.
See you Saturday night!