Magnificent Bastard

Sunday, June 4, 2023



Top 7 Ways to Golf Like a Total Toolbag

1.

Dress like a toolbag

See also, Top 10 Ways to Look Like a Total Toolbag

2.

Take a cart

Mixing in a salad and walking 18 holes could really help you out, fatty.

3.

Stand behind a player while he's putting

If you got a little closer you'd have an even better look at the line.

4.

Eat sunflower seeds

Leave these for the next time you're in a dugout.

5.

Be loud

You made a 12-footer for par. That's terrific. Now act like you've done it before.

6.

Use a rangefinder

"It's 144 to carry the water, 152 to the hole, 163 to rear bunker." Dude, if you were that good you'd be on a tour.

7.

Use a cellphone

The POTUS cut his round short rather than use on-course communications before the raid on Osama Bin Laden. You think that call from your wife can wait a few hours?

POURCAST

BETA

Gin and Tonic

  • 2 oz Hayman's Old Tom Gin
  • 2 dashes orange bitters
  • premium tonic water (Fever Tree or Q Tonic)

Pour gin over ice in a rocks glass, add the bitters, add tonic water to taste. Garnish with a lime or orange twist.


In-Depth Gin and Tonic Coverage:

Ask the MB: Spring Cocktail Guide

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