Ask the MB
A: Yeeeehawwwww! We reckon' you've arrived, compadre. Even if it is some sort of western-type fantasy (and that's OK) it sounds like you've successfully pulled this off, and we rate the degree of difficulty an 8.1 on the MB 10-point scale. Well done, you elk hide-wearin' Magnificent Bastard.
Every other potential shit-kickin' MB out there take note: This is risky business with potentially very low reward, and there ain't many Phils out there. One of our core shopping principles comes from GQ's creative director Jim Moore: "Never buy cowboy boots in Texas." The MB corollary to that rule is the removal of the "in Texas" part.