Magnificent Bastard

Tuesday, May 26, 2020

Ask the MB -- Principle of Organic Materials

Ask the MB -- Principle of Organic Materials
Q: Regarding North Face fleece, just what exactly is the principle of organic materials?

A: The principle of organic materials is simple: It's that organic materials are inherently superior to anything made by man, even if they are less practical. So when given a choice, always choose organic materials.

Try this thought experiment to illustrate the point: Imagine the ultimate MB -- JFK -- sailing a boat made out of fiberglass. Your head just exploded. See what we mean? Plus, given that organics are the result of Mother Nature, there are always slight imperfections that enhance another core MB attribute: artful dishevelment. (Note JFK's look.)

Use the following table to help guide your decision-making.

If you are about to:

Activity Choose Instead Of
Buy a dress shirt 100% cotton 50-50 cotton-poly blend
Side your house cedar vinyl
Write something down #2 pencil pen
Decide on a date The one with real breasts The one with fake breasts
Tee it up Featherie Titleist Pro V1
Climb Mt. Everest To wear pelts from Nepalese fauna North Face fleece




  • 2 oz Plymouth gin
  • 3/4 oz lemon juice
  • 1/2 oz Luxardo maraschino liqueur
  • 1/8 oz crème de violette

Lightly shake, strain into a chilled cocktail glass, garnish with lemon twist.


Currently in
Minneapolis, Minnesota

74° Partly Cloudy


Enter any city on earth & start cocktailing. (Zip codes work, too.)


recent posts


ask mb

Got a style question? We're all ears. And antlers. Ask away.

tip mb

If you know about something you think we should know about, let us know (so we can pretend we knew about it all along). Send a tip.