Magnificent Bastard

Wednesday, June 26, 2019



Tom Ford's Advice Stinks

That obnoxious odor invading your personal space? It's me.
That obnoxious odor invading your personal space? It's me.

Tom Ford makes ridiculously great menswear. His ad campaigns are even better. And he destroyed Band of Outsiders' Scott Sternberg in The Great Tie Width Debate. Tom Ford is an MB.

But he's offering an especially odorous order in his new 6 Style Rules Every Man Should Live By at neimanmarcus.com:

6. Finally, spray cologne all over.

At $63/ounce for Neroli Portofino Limited Eau de Parfum Ford has an interest in customers pouring it, or we suppose, misting it down the drain. Putting any ulterior motive aside, this advice violates at least two Magnificent Bastard axioms:

1. The Principle of Understatement
2. The Principle of Being Seen Coming, not Smelled

We are definitely not opposed to cologne. As we've gotten older we've gotten smellier and sometimes need notes of both spice and woods as a countermeasure. But instead of showering under an atomizer, try a couple dabs of a solid cologne like Alfred Lane's Vanguard. We have procured a large quantity of this and will have it available in the shop someday.

POURCAST

BETA

Southside (MB-Bastardized)

  • 2 oz gin
  • 1 oz fresh lemon juice
  • 1 sugar cube (or half teaspoon simple sugar)
  • soda water (if desired)

Place the sugar cube at the bottom of a lowball glass, add the fresh lemon juice, and mash with the back of a spoon. Fill two-thirds with ice and the gin and stir for at least 30 seconds. Add soda water, if desired, and give a quick stir. Garnish with a lemon wedge.


In-Depth Southside (MB-Bastardized) Coverage:

Ask the MB: Spring Cocktail Guide

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