Magnificent Bastard

Sunday, May 19, 2024



World Cup Quarterfinal Predictions

World Cup Quarterfinal Predictions
Last week longtime reader Duncan suggested we predict World Cup quarterfinal appearances based on the teams' coaches' match-day attire. The Saturday matches played out as you'd expect. From top:

Uruguay's Oscar Tabarez wears boxy banker suits, but was an easy winner over South Korea's Huh Jung-Moo, who's officially the last person on earth who should be wearing a spread collar. In the other match Ghana's Milovan Rajevac could've worn almost anything to beat Bob Bradley; the poor bastard's only a fanny pack shy of pulling off of the archetypal clueless American tourist look.

The Sunday matchups were a different story. The normally natty Joachim Loew wore some kind of royal blue synthetic v-neck under a blazer and his German team still crushed Fabio Capello's Englishmen. Then Mexico's Javier Aguirre's understated elegance easily succumbed to the noisy, shiny, diamond earring-wearing Diego Maradona, who looks a contestant on the Argentine version of Tool Academy.

So far it's a flip of a coin. A 50-50 proposition. How should things play out?

Paraguay (Gerardo Martino) over Japan (Takeshi Okada)

Portugal (Carlos Queiroz) over Spain (Vicente Del Bosque)

Netherlands (Bert van Marwijk) over Slovakia (Vladimir Weiss)

Brazil (Dunga) over Chile (Marcello Bielsa)

POURCAST

BETA

Southside (MB-Bastardized)

  • 2 oz gin
  • 1 oz fresh lemon juice
  • 1 sugar cube (or half teaspoon simple sugar)
  • soda water (if desired)

Place the sugar cube at the bottom of a lowball glass, add the fresh lemon juice, and mash with the back of a spoon. Fill two-thirds with ice and the gin and stir for at least 30 seconds. Add soda water, if desired, and give a quick stir. Garnish with a lemon wedge.


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